You have to be born again

Recently a dear friend came to me with a lot of pain and fear, because his life is falling apart. Nothing is working right now he said, if nothing changes quickly, I don't know where I will be by next month. I saw nothing but sadness in his eyes.

I congratulated him because not long ago I went thru the same life and death experience. I chose death, which is to let go of control and let existence take over my life. I am glad I did, it was not easy but it was very simple, because you don't need to do anything. My life is never the same after that because existence is in charge, not me any more. My perception/ awareness has gone up ten folds since. This is beyond logic. I see divinity every day, right here within me.

At certain point on our spiritual journey, suddenly one day you will reach this point where there is no more path, either you will have to take a leap of faith- consciously choose death to who you are, or continue the path which created by you over and over again.

Make wise decision my dear friend, time is ticking.

If you have to be born once again, you must die first- Sadhguru

absolute devotion

I had opportunity to work with one of Sadhguru's trained teacher since April. She is very young and focused. She is always full of energy, never complained. While we all get tired towards the end of the day, I think her day had just begun. She is very sharp, has absolute clarity on any subjects that we brought up. One time I was praising her that how beautiful to be with her, and she corrected me right away saying it is not her, it is all Sadhguru.

I learned from her the absolute devotion, one point focus of volunteering. Many times I was watching her working, it brings tears to my eyes, There was no rest for her anytime of the day, just selfless devotion. She does not own a home, no possessions, but she has the world.

looking back last five months working with her, it turned out to be such a blessing. I feel alive, grateful. The awareness is surging, and the best above all, I noticed Sadhguru's presence more than ever before.

Devotion is when your involvement with life is so absolute that yourself do not matter anymore- Sadhguru

Life is involement

It has been a while since last blog, not just because work has been busy, also because Sadhguru has been in California for a couple of months, all activities were intensified.

Looking back last few months, seems like motion pictures fast forwarded.  Activity after activity, no time to even think about what was going on. I have driven more mileage last two months than previous year altogether. This has been involvement at its best.

One thing I did not expect, however, was how much inner growth has happened for all of us among mediators. Last Saturday during monthly Sathsang, I could not help but noticing each meditator looked like a beautiful flower, one by one, as each one of us blooming right in front of our eyes. How do you explain this awesome experience? We all have become one, touched by the existence at that moment.

"Life is involvement, where there is no life, there is no involvement"- Sadhguru

Jesus and the cross

for 25 years, used to be a christian, I learned from Bible that Jesus was nailed on the cross because he loves us, willing to die on the cross for us in order to wash away our sins.

As I continue to grow in Sadhguru, I now have a different understanding of this. To experience life, to be life, you have to step aside, you are in the way. In other words, you need to devoid yourself. To simply let go of controlling of your own life, because you really cannot control any thing in life.

The night Jesus was about to be crucified, he asked the divine to take away the cup of death, it is too painful facing death. Yet he also said only Father's will be done, not his own. Meaning if life has to happen, self has to go, therefore death on the cross, no more self. Once self is gone, life rushes in, and your life begins.

This morning one of the meditator I admire and respect very much called, she was in tears telling me how she gave her heart and soul to volunteering, yet some how she was misunderstood, unjustified by the situations and people around her. Listening to her, I felt her frustrations and pain. Suddenly this Jesus and the cross image came to my mind, and I shared with her, she was very inspired and encouraged. Because she is in this critical transitional place, either she becomes Christ, transcend her self thru cross like Jesus, or continue to identify herself in worldly manner and suffer.

Volunteering is a process of giving yourself. It’s an opportunity to give yourself- Sadhguru

Goodbye Elmo

Elmo left us on April 2, 2014 at age of 16. For years every morning, rain or shine, I'd take him to the park for a walk, except last two days of his life while he was too weak to stand up.

Though he has left us, many times I felt his presence as if he was showing appreciation to me that he has had a good life. One example was when I was in ashram, TN for Samyama sadhana on April 16-20. Towards the end of the sadhana, I got "stuck" and can go no further. Elmo showed up and gently showed me the way, the way of non-doing, the way of life. He showed me what life really is, the life that  I have been searching for all over the world, but found it at the tip of my nose.

I went to Isha Yoga Center in Coimbatore, India twice for Samaya program, twice I was "stuck" at the same place, no matter how hard I struggled, it was useless. This time I thought I was going to give up again, except Elmo came to help.

Thank you Elmo. Thank you for showing me how to breathe, what life is. You are my life.

"Life is not in our activity, not in our possessions, and not in what we touch, taste, see or smell. You are life- the rest are things"- Sadhguru

Perfect storm

"Spirituality means to put your evolutionary process on fast forward"- Sadhguru

When I read today's quote from Sadhguru, I cannot help but bow down my head and let the tears flowed. In late 2012, beginning of 2013, The storm of life was hitting me hard, it was like everything I owned, everything I thought was me, was drifting away. I was losing the situations, I was losing the last bit of control that I thought I had. Even breathe was leaving me by the moment.

So I did what anyone one could have done. I yelled out to Sadhguru, save me Sadhguru!! One day while I was doing my practice, this awareness arose, "I have fast forwarded your life, anything is about to happen, let it happen in this life time. If this is too much for you, I can slow it down." What a sweet pleasant surprise from Sadhguru.

The storm went on for another 6 months, many times I was still struggling, trying to get control of the situations, but it failed every time- until I completely surrendered. No more self control, simply let go.

Today, looking back at this perfect storm. I am so grateful for Sadhguru. Together, we did it. Transformation takes life, life takes transformation. Be glad that hardships is looming in the horizon!! Remember, Sadhguru is watching!!

volunteer at LA Inner Engineering

"Putting the well being of others above your own creating a different kind of strength, a strength will carry you thru life and beyond"- Sadhguru

I often wonder how to experience life beyond this world. Years following Sadhguru, attending all kinds of programs, all I got was a glimpse of mystical here and there. Last Sept I volunteered at World Peace Day, I experienced something so dramatic that I could not explain. Sadhguru has mentioned so many times that to get to heaven, one must learn how to volunteer, now I understand fully.

I volunteered again in LA Inner Engineering 2 weeks ago, once again I was in heaven!! With Sadhguru!!

Have you touched sadhguru's hands?

Have you touched Sadhguru's hands? 

Touch my hand

Before my voice will falter

Sit with me

Until the shadows go

Become me

Before I am no more. 

- Sadhguru

A friend of mine sent me this quote, as I read it, I was overwhelmed with Sadhguru's presence.

I have sat with Sadhguru with the long shadows beside me, I have been with sadhguru's presence without hearing Him say anything. I have been in such dimension that there was only one between us. I also have often heard Him say that to make the best use of Him while He is still here.

Dear Sadhguru, let me become you, before you are no more. 

let go and let be

I have been conducting monthly sathsang for more than a year and half. It started out as a predictable training procedure for the possibilities, now I have a very different perception and experience.

Last 3-4 sathsangs, I began to experience something I have never felt before. I began to notice the collective energy that was surging in the hall, then the mantra and Sadhguru's presence all coming together beautifully. By then you began to see tears coming out of people's eyes. You see all the meditators become one. In that silence, we are it.


Spiritual process is a heightened level of abandon. You do not abandon life – you abandon the straight jacket of a personality that you created for yourself- Sadhguru

a joyful day in heaven

A dear friend came visit during the weekend. She was taking pictures of me as she is expressing happiness thru the pictures. She asked me to think of something happy, I grimmed, hesitated for a moment. Then she said, tell me about the first time I met Sadhguru. I thought about it for a few seconds, my heart opened up, smile came naturally. Next thing I know, the near by trees, flowers, birds, stone  they all became alive, they reached out to me and greeted me like never before. It has always been here how come I never noticed ? See if you see happiness in these pictures?

"If you allow the source of creation within you to find expression, joyful is the only way you can be"- Sadhguru